My approach to people...
When we are developing and growing in childhood, our experiences result in the building of wired networks in our brains. Those networks continue to engage our bodies to respond mindlessly, without thinking. But culturally, we're conditioned to mentally shame, blame, and guilt ourselves (or others) about those responses, even though those networks were created before we knew much of anything about how the world works. Those networks were created using the emotional and cognitive context that existed when those experiences happened. The result is our minds and bodies taking action from activation of those networks when similar events trigger them. BUT, similar is not the same contextually, so reactions are often inaccurate, ineffective, and not in context to a current situation. We use those networks until we're dead, unless we change them...but nobody teaches us how to change them or how ways we've been conditioned to respond to stress, by doing the things that would make others comfortable, actually make those networks stronger, not weaker.
So, understanding that...Do you feel like you're stuck in your head? Do you feel like nobody understands you? Do you seem to feel guilty about everything? Do you feel like you get in your own way? Do people say you self-sabotage? Do you struggle to feel motivated? Do you never seem to establish solid healthy relationships? Do you cope using alcohol or substances? Are you annoyed by other people? Do you have a fear of commitment? Do people say you need to process your trauma? Do you feel unloved? Do your emotions get away from you? Does communication with others always seem to feel like a struggle? And, do you believe you're the common denominator in all your failings?
If so, a coach may be the right person for you!! I will help you understand how those responses to the world are likely normal within the context of your own life but aren't effective. Our goal will not be to help you be more normal, you already are! Our goal will be to help you be more effective in areas of your life where you're struggling. I'm always going to normalize, before I ever pathologize! So, no diagnosis, just understanding and skill building to change those networks and have more effective responses to your stressors.
My goal is to help you learn to work with your brain, not against it, as we often learn from society and many main stream mental health approaches.
Whether I work with you as an individual or you as a couple (or any relationship), I see all individual's as normal...all 100% correct in how they see and try to solve problems, because that's how our experiences wired us to think. But normal for one person does not mean normal for another. When I work with a couple, you can think of me as an interpreter that speaks both people languages, but helps each person communicate effectively and interpret accurately. Here in lies the only true common denominator in all relationships...patterns. People are not the problems in relationships, patterns are, and most of those patterns were established in childhood where responses served a purpose...to keep parents happy, calm, quiet, establish peace, create safety, etc. But those responses after getting out of childhood, generally no longer have a lot of value, because the context of your life is different now, even if their are similarities.
So, if you'd like to learn how to work with your brain and the brains of others, rather than against them, please feel free to schedule an appointment and immediately experience how you're normal and the gain the skills for how to be more effective.
So, understanding that...Do you feel like you're stuck in your head? Do you feel like nobody understands you? Do you seem to feel guilty about everything? Do you feel like you get in your own way? Do people say you self-sabotage? Do you struggle to feel motivated? Do you never seem to establish solid healthy relationships? Do you cope using alcohol or substances? Are you annoyed by other people? Do you have a fear of commitment? Do people say you need to process your trauma? Do you feel unloved? Do your emotions get away from you? Does communication with others always seem to feel like a struggle? And, do you believe you're the common denominator in all your failings?
If so, a coach may be the right person for you!! I will help you understand how those responses to the world are likely normal within the context of your own life but aren't effective. Our goal will not be to help you be more normal, you already are! Our goal will be to help you be more effective in areas of your life where you're struggling. I'm always going to normalize, before I ever pathologize! So, no diagnosis, just understanding and skill building to change those networks and have more effective responses to your stressors.
My goal is to help you learn to work with your brain, not against it, as we often learn from society and many main stream mental health approaches.
Whether I work with you as an individual or you as a couple (or any relationship), I see all individual's as normal...all 100% correct in how they see and try to solve problems, because that's how our experiences wired us to think. But normal for one person does not mean normal for another. When I work with a couple, you can think of me as an interpreter that speaks both people languages, but helps each person communicate effectively and interpret accurately. Here in lies the only true common denominator in all relationships...patterns. People are not the problems in relationships, patterns are, and most of those patterns were established in childhood where responses served a purpose...to keep parents happy, calm, quiet, establish peace, create safety, etc. But those responses after getting out of childhood, generally no longer have a lot of value, because the context of your life is different now, even if their are similarities.
So, if you'd like to learn how to work with your brain and the brains of others, rather than against them, please feel free to schedule an appointment and immediately experience how you're normal and the gain the skills for how to be more effective.
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Please note: If you do not see an available opening that works for your schedule or an available service option listed on the calendar please call or text (970)319-1999
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