When you're body is responding to an attack (physical or emotional), your body is conditioned to respond. Like your cave dwelling ancestors, threat will ignite your fight, flight, or freeze response. Blood flow goes to your heart, your lungs, and your muscles in order to fight off an attacker or flee one. Your body is not highly capable of learning because there is less blood flow (oxygenation) to the brain. Your kids respond the same way. Fear based discipline will actually only slow down your child's learning! They may learn what your trying to teach them but it will likely take longer.
Do you want to be a feared parent, or a trustworthy parent?
Do you want your child to make decisions based on whether or not he or she is going to get caught or based on his or her moral character?
Connect with your child's emotions, and less with their behavior and they become capable of making choices based on emotional value.
Mary Bowles, PsyD, abd, LMFT
My blog posts are just some of the bits of information I find useful for some or all of my clients.